Moving in the right direction

 Well this past Sunday I cleaned out my closet.... seriously I really should do that more often... so much crap!

anyway I got rid of lots of things, some too big and some too small. I figured as I loose this weight I am going to want new pretty things not old warn out clothes I haven't warn in well way too long.

So now my big ole closet is empty with the exception of my dress clothes from when I worked in a professional field, I hated to get rid of those you never know when you will need a good power suit.

I also pulled out the summer shorts and let me tell you last summer I stayed away from the scale but I feel the difference in my shorts thats for sure. I am down to 242-243 depending on the day. I am hoping to be down to 225 by my husbands birthday June 5. I feel like that is a healthy goal. 20 lbs in 9 weeks thats 2.2 lbs a week. Sooo doable don't you think??

Leave me your best tips for loosing weight. What is your favorite low cal meal??? And how do you keep yourself from getting into a lack luster routine???

I can use any and all help so please let me know how all you awesome ladies do it???

I leave you with a little Fortunate Fool by the wonderful Jack Johnson

One Big Fat Excuse

So I have had the intention to lose weight my entire life. I mean I've been on a mental diet since well as long as I can remember. (Mental diet meaning that I start diets and fail in a everyday cycle) I remember as a small child I grew faster than the other kids. I mean I was 5'5" in 6th grade  and no I haven't grew an inch since, so with that I just kept eating like normal kids do (crap) but since I was no longer growing up I grew out. In 8th grade I remember weighing 175 lbs. My thought was if I just don't put on any more weight I will be fine. HA who doesn't gain weight in high school and college??? So needless to say I graduated high school staying in that range of 180-190 lbs then in college I jumped to 230 lbs and for five years after that I jumped back in forth from 230-200 then back. Now I sit here typing this at 245 lbs. and just want to cry because that is 10 lbs less then my highest ever but seriously what happened??? and why am I still here. Obviously I could sit here and blame all kinds of stress and events but when it boils down to it. I haven't made me a priority even when I think I am its half ass.

This is seriously one of the hardest things for me to type and even harder to put out there. I feel like I'm standing naked in the middle of time square, but its what I need. Face the truth! See what I have become and fix it. Put me first. Not let life become one big excuse.

I know most of the people who follow my blog workout lots and have their own weight issues weather you just don't feel comfortable with the 5 extra pounds on you. It's about what is comfortable for you and what works for you. I can honestly say its been so long since I've felt good about my body that I don't know what that number or even feeling is looks like, but I will say that today marks a new day. A day to cut the crap and get down to the truth of my issues and not just my weight. This blog will become a complete look into things helping me find me again.  Which is a joke since I think my last post was something similar to this. In the blog thought at least. But I'm going to honest and 100% real. I ask you not to judge me or those whom may comment with their own struggles because this is hard. One of the hardest things again remember I'm standing naked in times square here.

My husband asked me something today and I didn't have an answer so that is goal one.

"What is holding you back? What is keeping you from pushing yourself ?"

I sat there thinking about this for a long time and all excuses set aside I had no real honest answer.

So today I will walk a mile, may not seem like much but it is a starting place. So today is day one and I will check back in here on day 4.

I hope you have a great St.Patrick's day and wear lots of green.

Starting a little early...

So it's not even December yet (okay only by one day) and I am already working on my Resolution..Solution. You see as a woman we all make a small resolution every year to lose weight, eat a little better, be more active something that ends with us being healthier. Then we let life crush that resolution and we just let life keep on. Well this year I am starting early... trying to make things a habit before the hype of the new year.

I started reading "Your Best Body Now" by Tosca Reno and have learned a ton about clean eating which makes since to me. Eating Clean is just eating things as natural as possible. Which I doubt I will ever do completely but it does make me think about how and what I'm putting in my body no matter how it is advertised. See Diet and low fat doesn't make anything good for you.

See I put on an astonishing 20-30lbs in a little over a year! That is just nuts!!!! A lot was part of meds I was on and the other is I just wasn't being active nor eating right.

See I married a man who can eat whatever he wants without fear... I am the complete opposite and need to fear everything I eat.

So now at my heaviest EVER and too heavy to want to post it for the world to see just yet, I am working towards changing my habits when it comes to food. I am making me a priority because lets face it I don't have much choice at this rate I have to make a change or "gulp" else.

So last night I weighed and measured all my measurements wrote them down in a little book and will continue to do this weekly. I need to know where I am to help drive me forward. I think its why weight watchers worked for me in the past.

I will let you know how it is going in a weekly post. I will give you updates on my loss, gains (I'm hoping not), workouts, and what I'm changing.

So wish me luck.